Getting Rowdy..

Hey all you Rowdy girls and boys!

I've been getting emails asking if I still have any bags left, the answer is YES! I am about sold out of the Bowler style bags (not shown), but I still have a good supply of the Rowdy Rocker style bags, the Rowdy Scoop News bags, and the awesome, oh so cute, Rowdy Changing Pads!

The Scoop News Bag: $30.00 (retail around $65.00)

The Scoop News bag is big and floppy and so totally hot. Complete with snap out liner,and removable change purse, this bag is a must have. Perfect for day trips.. or whatever.. my niece even uses one as her school bag!

The Rowdy Convertible Rocker: $30.00 and under! (retail $109.99)

This bag is my favorite! My kids are way past the diaper bag stage so I use mine as an over sized purse. I love it, and I get compliments on the Rowdy Convertible Rocker everywhere I go.. Available in black/cream, green/cream, and copper/cream.

The Rowdy Changing pad: Ignore the price, mine are only $15.00!!



The Rowdy Changing Pad is perfect when your little rowdy one starts to get past the diaper bag stage.. but is still not free of the "diaper" stage. Keep a Rowdy changing pad in your car and your always ready for the unexpected. The changing pad is roomy enough to easily store an extra set of clothes along with diapers and wipes.



Come on...


I do also have a small supply of baby blankets, and one of a kind Rowdy demo product samples.. let me know if you're interested! Camillemcc@gmail.com

All sales are completed via email. (camillemcc@gmail.com) I accept the following payment options: paypal, money order or personal check (unless you're local, then cash is an option too!)

Camillemcc@gmail.com

This is pretty much the last of the inventory... once they are gone they're gone. Don't miss out! camillemcc@gmail.com

Sneak Peak....2009 Christmas Album Kits

Wanna peak...

My 2009 Christmas album kits..

"Oh Little Town of Bethlehem"


This year, due to time constrains, and my desire to keep my sanity, I am only making three album kits as opposed to my usual five.

I've got the first album cut, and the first couple pages partially done.

I have not named the album yet.. but I think you'll get the point.

I am so excited about this album.. I'm trying something new.. and it's working out really well.. I am so excited to finish and show you what it is I'm talking about.

My goal is to finish the album today, and get it posted for pre-sales here on my blog, by Tuesday morning.

That's a tall order.. but realistic.

I'd love to know what you think so far.

9/26/2009
UPDATE::

There is no way I'm going to have this album posted before the weekend.

I started a new full time job today, and until I adjust to the schedule change.. not a lot of anything is going to get done.

However, if you are into nativity albums, or creche albums.. it will be worth the wait... The album is looking SOOOOOO good! :)

xoxox

Cam

Bravery

I have this amazing "sister." Her name's Kat. And she is amazing, AMAZING.

One of Kat's greatest strengths is that she knows how to love, and show her love, and be supportive, and be a great friend, and a confidant...

And it does not matter if she agrees with you, or likes your decision, and would have made the same decision herself.. she just knows how to make a person feel loved.. and important... and special... and mentally sound.. like no matter how crazy I feel like I'm getting, she helps me to feel grounded, and she helps me to know that God still loves me and that I'm going to be okay.

And she does it better than anyone I have ever met.

She has great faith.

((and she is so beautiful and so much fun!!))



Anyway, I found these pants at Kat's house.. They are Kat's pants.


Cute, army green, cargo, brave girl pants.

And so I had to borrow them.

Because they remind me of Kat's self confidence...

And they remind me to be brave.

And besides, I need cargo pants to carry my baggage.

I'm trying to unload a bit of my baggage... but I don't even know about all of it yet. I'm discovering it a bit of a time.

For example.

If I respect someone.. or if a person in authority gives me their opinion about something. I automatically agree with them.. regardless of how I really feel.. because I want their approval.

For example:

I am a republican. I have always been a republican... I have always voted 100% republican.

I have no idea what republicans really stand for or believe.

I have no idea who 90% of the people I have voted for even were, or what they stood for.

Or why Republicans think Democrats are evil Satan worshipers...

Or why Democrats think Republicans are evil Satan worshipers...

AND, I really like the idea of socialized health care. I know it will have faults, but I don't think they could be possibly worse than the health care situation in America right now.. I mean which is worse, possibly a lower standard of care, or sitting up nights with a severely sick child with a horrible case of bronchitis... stressed to the max because your husband is out of work and you have no health insurance, and you know getting the care your child needs is going to put you hundreds of dollars in debt that you can't pay back..

Yeah, I did that... like so many other people... I've been there.

This post is not about socialized health care.. or politics...

It's about me figuring out what I want to believe.. not what I'm told to believe, or expected to believe.

(these are my brave girl cargo pants... I think I'm going to wear cargo pants every day for a while..)

It's about self esteem too.

I SOOOOO wish there was a self esteem store.. well there sort of is.. it's at the mall, but unfortunately self esteem that you have to buy doesn't usually last past the 3rd wash cycle.

In high school my self esteem was built on what other people said about me. For me, that meant I liked boys a lot... because boys made me feel really good about myself. Everyone needs to be built up, and I only seemed to get that from boys. And so I spent all my time thinking about boys, and wanting boys to like me, and thinking of ways to make boys like me more. And the more I did to make boys like me more, the less self esteem I had. And so the more I felt like I needed boys to like me.. It was a really effective downward spiral.

Healthy... I know.

Then I got married. And my husband did his best to compliment me when I looked nice, but it wasn't enough. It wasn't his fault, and I do not blaim him. It was my baggage. I was use to more attention.

I went for a long time not feeling very good about myself, till I found art again.

Then my self esteem became tied entirely to my art. If I make a piece and don't get compliments, or I should say, don't get a LOT of compliments on it, I feel very, very down. I know that sounds very self centered, and very prideful, and very "Oh look at me.. and look at what I can do!" And it totally is. See, I have baggage. BIG big baggage.

And now that I've lost weight and feel relatively good about my body image ALL of my self esteem is built into compliments on my figure and compliments on my art. If I lost those two things I would feel completely 100% worthless.

I realize all of this makes me look like a completely self centered B!%@).

Maybe I am.

But, I don't want to be like this.

I want to change. I've wanted to for a very, very long time.. But I didn't know how. I still don't really.. I just recognize that change needs to happen.

I want to know that if something happened to me and I lost those things that I could still love myself.

I'm working on how to get there.

Introducing Aletha:


Ah Aletha!

She is the only project I managed to finish at Brave Girls Camp.



Alethea means "truth."

She carries messages of truth in her beak.

Today I am clipping a new message in her beak.

The message says,

"Your soul deserve your attention, sweet friend."


And so it begins.

Can you be BRAVE?

What does it mean to be BRAVE?

Brave \Brave\, v. t. [imp. & p. p. Braved; p. pr. & vb. n. Braving.]

1. To encounter with courage and fortitude; to set at defiance; to defy; to dare. [1913 Webster]

These I can brave, but those I can not bear. --Dryden. [1913 Webster]

2. To adorn; to make fine or showy. [Obs.]

[1913 Webster]

Thou [a tailor whom Grunio was browbeating] hast braved meny men; brave not me; I'll neither be faced or braved. --Shak. [1913 Webster]


What is a Brave girl?
A brave girl faces her life problems head on. Without wavering.

Oh, she feels fear..
and anger...
and sorrow...
and loneliness...
and even despair at times.


And disappointment... can't forget disappointment.

And change... Change that she did not want, but needed, and was prepared for..

if she knew it or not.


A brave girls has been bruised... emotionally... sometimes physically... usually mentally.


A brave girl has inner fears... and denial... and hangups..

And a brave girl is SO STRONG. She has inner strength inside screaming to take charge.
Brave girls have dreams... BIG dreams... dreams to change their lives... and the lives of those around them.. and then maybe.. the world.


And she dreams her dream, and dreams her dream,and then dreams her dream again...


until she gets it right.



And, man alive... she gets it right. She really listens and gets it right..
Brave girls do not hold back.

Brave girls have baggage. Lots and lots of baggage...


Brave girls can STRUT when they need to.


And lift each other up... and bear one another's burdens.

No matter how heavy.


Brave girls know... it's all good.. ALL of it. All the trials, and meanies, and heartache, and pain... it's ALL good.

Brave girls KNOW first hand what it takes to makes us brave.

Brave girls are not afraid.


Well, okay... some brave girls are afraid of itty bitty snakes... but only the real snakes... not the metaphors.

Brave girls do not slow down.

Brave girls take time for themselves... no matter how much they cannot afford it.


Brave girls share their love and their strength with those around them.


Brave girls assess what they have been given, and they make their lives amazing.
Brave girls do not give up, or cop out...

Even though they might want too..

Even though the temptation is SO strong..

Brave girls persevere.

Brave girls know life will be great! Really GREAT...


Maybe not today...
but if they continue to be brave.

And brave girls smile.


And put on a brave face...


and laugh.


Laugh till they cry, and then laugh some more.

((Even after crafting more in three days than they have in the entire rest of their life.))


Brave girls know after the rain the world is clean, and refreshed... and that the world has to have rain..

And rain often...


But the sunshine will ALWAYS be back.


Brave girls never indulge.

They have extreme self control...


Well, okay, sometimes brave girls indulge a little...

Well, over indulge a little...


But brave girls share their caramel.


Sometimes.


Once a brave girl... always a brave girl.





A brave girl has the strength and self confidence to look you square in the eye.




Brave girls are life long friends.

The kind of friend who is with you for the long haul.


And really wants to share your burdens.



Till we meet again... my brave girls.






I have been asleep all my life.

Drifting... not really knowing what I want or need... carrying around baggage that wasn't even my baggage, and along with the baggage, the worlds smallest violin case... ((hmmm, I wonder what could be in there?))

I admit.. I am not fully awake.. but I am stirring....

What matters.

Sunday I took my Jennica and Aaron for a walk. Noah has been sick with a fever. I missed having him there so much. The day was so beautiful.









I am so surprised any pictures of me came out.. my kids have not mastered the "push the button down slow so the camera can focus before it clicks" technique yet..








This next one cracks me up! Jennica says take my picture, so I do and she says, "Wait I'm not ready yet!"
NOW I'm ready.



I know I still owe you a Brave Girls post... hopefully later this afternoon.

xoxoxo

Goodbye anonymous comments...

Goodbye meanies..

I've been getting a few anonymous comments from people who clearly think they know more about what's going on in my heart, in my mind, and in my soul than even I do. YOU ARE RUDE. I DON'T LIKE YOU. LEAVE ME ALONE.

No, I do not post the comments, so don't bother looking for them.

If you want to post something hurtful for me to read you are going to have to own it.

No more anonymous comments.

Have a happy day.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program..

Brave Girls Camp was amazing. Loved every minute of it. WISH I was still there.

Right now, My cute kiddos would like to go on a walk.. and after that.. I am in desperate need of a nap...

So my brave girls and boys.. you'll just have to wait. It's okay. I know you can do it.

Don't miss me too much.. I'll be back.

It's time. The REAL Brave Girls Camp.

This is my friend, Melody.

For the longest time I was so convinced that Melody didn't like me. That there was something wrong with me that made me less than qualified to be her friend.

The truth is, I am horribly insecure, and I have low self esteem. Melody is amazing, and talented, and successful, and I didn't feel like I had anything to offer her. And so instead of trying to get to know Melody, I pushed my fears onto her and made it her fault..

Now that I've gotten to know her, I realize my perceptions were wrong. Melody never disliked me, and I have very unique talents and abilities that no one else has. I do have a lot to offer.

((I also know myself well enough, that in about 20 minutes when I proof read this post, I'm going to think to myself.. "What are you thinking? You have nothing to offer."))

It's a constant battle.

Most of the time I think I'm losing.

That's why I need friends like Melody, and Ali, and Kat, and Shawna... to help me remember who I am, to build me up. I only have a few amazing people like this in my life, and I would shrivel up and die without them.

Melody, and her sister Kathy are the co-founders of the world wide woman's organization Brave Girls Club.


Brave Girls Club is having their first ever Brave Girls Camp next week. A few weeks ago I blogged about the Brave Girls Camp practice run. This is the real thing. And not only do I get to go.. but I get to go as part of the staff. I am so excited.

I'll be leaving Monday morning and I will be gone all week.

I'd like to share some bits and pieces of a very special book I made at Brave Girls Practice Camp. I'm not sharing the whole thing, because parts of it are too personal, and it was hard enough to put those bits into writing in the book because I have not yet come to accept them. I'm really not ready to share them with the world.. well okay, with the five people who regularly check my blog...

This book is different from anything I have ever done before.. completely new art techniques I'm not use to... lots of paint, and lots of art medium.

(I am such a fan of medium now... oh my.. where have you been all my life??))

The book is titled, "A Little Bird Told Me."

It's full of special quotes and bits of advise that I need in my life right now.

The cover.

I have worked and reworked the cover so many times I'm not even sure whats hidden in all the layers. Which is kind of an accurate representation of my life right now.

As the cover is now, I don't feel satisfied with it. I want to add leaves to the tree, but I feel unsure of my abilities to do it right.. so I am waiting for inspiration... or till I feel like my talents are up to par.. or till the cows come home. I'm just waiting. My life is in the same place. It's getting there. But it's happening very slowly. And I don't usually know what to do to make it better, and I'm worried if I try I will only make it worse. And so I'm just waiting. Waiting to be shown how.




Dear Camille,

It's time to stop settling for less. Today. 15 Sep 2009.

I felt like it was important for my birds to be leashed. Because they can not be free, until I am free.



Dear Camille,

You will fly again.


Dear Camille,

You have a choice, you ALWAYS have a choice.


I tend to forget this. That I have a choice. I feel so required to be exactly what people expect me to be that I forget who I am. I forget what's important to me, I forget which end is even up, and I forget it doesn't have to be this way.

I have the choice to accept how I am treated. I have a choice to accept who I will let into the "house" that is me. I don't want people there who come in and trash the place, and leave graffiti of nasty mean words all over my walls, and leave me feeling drained and dirty and worthless.

Sometimes when we make a choice it's not always the right choice. And sometimes we need to make the wrong choices... and sometimes the consequences of our choices hurt. And that's okay.

Cam,

You have what you need to change the parts of your life that are not working... it is time.



Dear Camille,

You will never regret standing up for what you believe in, no matter how hard it seems at the time.

This is the key to inner peace. This is the key to fortitude. This is the key to sanctification. This is the key to breaking free of the cages and the leash, and everything else that might be holding us back from progressing.. from finding answers, from freedom.


Dear Camille,

A life of happiness and peace is always possible, make the choice to make it YOUR life.


To wear a leash, one must wake up everyday and put it on, or allow someone else to put one on you. Sometimes it doesn't feel like you have a choice, but you do. Everyday, every minute of everyday, you have the choice.

And yes, a lot of people will be very angry and upset with you when you make the choice that you willnot be wearing the leash any longer. But that is not your fault, or your problem. It is theirs.


Dear Camille,

It might feel uncomfortable, maybe even difficult, but this is exactly where you need to be for where you want to go.

Sometimes, it's a bit more than uncomfortable or difficult. Sometimes it seems terrifying, impossible, absolutely horrifying. Most of the time it feels so much easier to just say to yourself, and to the world, "Oh never mind... this is soooo very hard. Will someone please help me with this leash? I need to put it on. I need the leash. I need it. Please?"


Dear Camille,

You are not your past, you are not your mistakes, you are not your pain... you are a perfect, beautiful soul.

Life is a series of beginnings and endings, let the old stuff go, embrace the new.


Dear Camille,

A thousand unseen helping hands are there to assist you at all times, but you first must know what you want... and then you must ask for it.

Sometimes it feels like so many people around me are holding out a leash, and saying, "Here, you just need to put this back on. Everything will be okay. Just let me help you into your leash." Some of them are not nearly so kind about it, but yell and scream and nash their teeth, demading I return to my leash at once or they will no longer love me.

Sometimes I feel very very alone in my decisions. At these times I rely on the power of God and his ministering angels to help me through.


Cam,

No one will ever completely understand your pain my sweet friend, but you can heal your pain by trying to understand and comfort the pain of others...

it is such a miracle.

It's okay to focus inward for a while. When you need to fix YOU, but it's much more productive and healing when you can forget yourself and help someone else.


Dear Camille,

You already know exactly what the answer is... just trust it... it's right.

(That doesn't mean it's going to be easy.. or I won't question it..over and over and over again.)


The back cover.

Brave Girls 09'


This book means a lot ot me, becuase I tend to forget the lessons in this book. sometimes I want to forget the lessons in this book, and sometimes I get so distracted that I don't even realize I've forgotten. I know within the next 24 hours, I will forget and remember over and over again.. but each day, I tend to remember more and forget less.

That's how it works. This thing called change.

This week at Brave Girls Camp should be amazing. I'm refocusing. rebuilding, committing to myself. I can't wait.

Wish you were all coming.

Love,

Cam
xoxo

Random Pictures from my Phone

Getting the pictures off my phone is a little bit of a pain.. well it takes like 5 extra minutes.. but seriously, who can be bothered?

Here's some bits and pieces from August, September and October.

Random.

First up, The picture of Ali and I in the Seattle airport, just minutes after we finally got to meet in person. Love you Ali!

Ali again. The picture is a bit blurry, we were picking up some fresh veggies from a good friend.


Alright. Next up... I hate to claim these... but this was from about a month ago.

My family.. getting together on a Sunday afternoon, for a little after dinner fun on the deck with the mullet wig and the antique accordion.

Who knew Honher was still in business.. making accordions..



Alex and his girlfriend Cheyenne.

It's always a good day... a good day for love... when a girl gets to serenade her mullet man and his entire extended family, on the accordion.


"Hey baby, You're so sweet. Can you get me another bratwurst?"


((If they get engaged and want to use this picture for their announcements, I will totally give them the rights.))

I mean, why would they not?? It's perfect.


Next up... Jill. she wanted this picture for her profile on the singles website, Mullet Passion.

That's right guys... it could all be yours... check out singlemulletchickswhoplaytheaccordingandwantyou.com


Who doesn't love a mullet baby.


On this same lovely summer afternoon of mullets and accordions... I present to you...

The Zucchini Phone.

Cruz on the zucchini phone...

And Justin on the zucchini phone.


"I told you, I paid the insurance on my beet mobile. Yes. I paid with lettuce."

That's it. Hope you enjoyed the show.

Come back again soon for more lame.

Color Me Hired

Carefree summer hair:

I need income.. someone please hire me hair:


(As soon as I finish eating all this GOOD Cadbury chocolate my lovely Ali brought me all the way from Australia..)


And change my clothes into something business attire..

The professional, "You need me, you really need me" smile. Well.. as close as I can get to it anyway..


Wish me luck!!

I'm going to need it.

It's okay.. I don't stink anymore.

Like I said yesterday...

Mystic Tanning. Cool, instant glow... but smelly, smelly, smelly.

Woohoo! I haven't looked this tan since... Forever?

Thanks Kat! <3 xoxo

Mammi

This is Cruz.

Cruz is my nephew. He is so cute.. and he has refused to say my name.
Until today. When he pointed at a picture of me on my blog and said, "Mammi"

:) Yay! I'm Mammi.

On a side note... Today I went Mystic Tanning... for the first time.

I would post pictures.. but seriously, Mystic tanning makes you smell SOOOOOOOOOO bad.. I'm afraid the smell with come through the computer and knock you all out.. so I will wait till tomorrow after I've had a shower. You'll be glad I did... waited.. that is.

You asked for it... you got it, baby.

Hi.

My name is Camille.
I am 33 years old and I am wearing high school homecoming dresses.

And I freaking love it.




I feel like a wall flower without a date.

Kat took the pictures.

Then we talked about going out for a night on the town.. in the dresses.

I told her the dresses are only here for alterations and the owners probably wouldn't appreciate it.

((but maybe we can borrow the dresses after homecoming...))


Seriously.

I can't believe I didn't get asked.

Okay, technically when I WAS actually a high school student I can proudly say I went to every dance. Every single dance. I loved it. And yes, I still have all my formals.

((Hmm.. I am totally going to get them out and try them on.))

And I feel completely ripped off.. the dresses are way cuter now than when I was in high school.


NEXT.

Aprons.

I am going to this really special amazing retreat in a week. I'll be working part of the time as staff.. so I got this cool apron and an assignment to decorate it.

Yum. fun.


This is what I started with. Standard restaurant apron with the retreat logo and my name.

Here's what I did.

Freaking...


Stinking...



Cute!
I love it. Kat said it reminds her of a sexy maid costume. What do you think??

The ruffles make me want to jump up and down... and when I put the apron on.. I do.

I was so excited about how it was turning out, I worked on it till 3:30 am.. and didn't even realize it had gotten late.

Alright.

Done being a dork. At least for the next 8 hours. Hope you get a chance to see this cause I will most likely delete the post in the morning.

Well, maybe not.

Love you all! Thanks for the overwhelming support for my formal fetish.

CAM

You're opinion wanted...

I am altering some homecoming formals and I know this is sad.. and a bit pathetic, but I FREAKING miss formal events, and I can't help trying on the dresses.. partly because I need to in order to check the fit and partly because I LOVE formal wear.

I am such an, " I wanna go back to high school just so I can go to prom again!" kind of girl.

Anyway, here's my big question...

Would it be completely tacky to take pictures of myself in the dresses and post them on my blog??

Yeah, you're probably right..

Dang it.

I might just do it anyway.