Monday, April 7, 2008

What a great weekend!

This weekend I had the opportunity to listen to some really inspiring words that seemed to be directed straight to me and my family. Words that inspired and lifted my soal and reminded me of just how important this time right now is, when I have young children who need my attention and love so much. I was encouraged to spend more time with them and to really show them that I loved them, not just tell them.

This special time passes so quickly through our fingers. I can hardly believe my oldest child, whom I can remember every detail about when he was born... and the sleepless nights... and my excitment over every little milestone, and now he's already 8 years old. He's getting so independent. The milestones are so different. Now instead of milestones like first roll over, and first first tooth, it's the first job, first school report...

And my little Jennica girl. The memories I'm having as I go through her old baby clothes to sort them... She's so big already and SO indepenent. I remember a couple years ago dropping her off for her first day of preschool and telling her I would miss her. Her reaction was, "MOM! I'm only going to be gone for a little while!" hehe. At least she still gets a little sad some days about going to kindergarten and just wants to stay home with me.

And Aaron. He seems to have stayed younger to me than he really is. He was a little delayed with crawling and walking and quite delayed with talking. It just felt like time was standing still and he was going to be my little boy forever. Now he has to sing... the same song... over and over through EVERY meal. It's usually Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star (at this particular moment it's Farmer in the Dell.) Even though he had a slow start, I can see how smart he is. A couple weeks ago while we were at the doctors office, Andy showed Aaron a puzzle. The puzzle had about 8-10 ocean related pieces. There was a Jellyfish, a dolphin, an octopus, angel fish, sea horse, ... I can't remember all the others. Anyway, I had been talking to the billing department when Andy first showed Aaron the puzzle. A couple minutes later, when I came back, Aaron showed me each piece one at a time and named them, getting everyone right. Two weeks later we were back at the doctors office and he got the same puzzle out. He didn't remember ever piece and he called the jellyfish a jelly bean (Easter did fall within those two weeks) but I was so surprised. He has great retention and I think he will breeze through school.

And of course I can't forget the baby I'm carrying. I keep congratulating myself because I've made it through the 1/2 way mark, but the baby still seems so small. I haven't been able to feel movement externally yet. I need to remind myself to appreciate this time. I don't plan on having any more children. Sometimes I wonder if that's a mistake. I suppose I question it because I love little children and it's sad to think I'll never have another one, well, after this one anyway. My idenity is so wrapped up in being a mother of small children that I'm not sure I'll know what to do with myself when they start to all grow up. I don't know if I'll be able to become a mother of teenagers, and I know full well, I can't become a mother of adult children. I still feel like an adult child myself most of the time. I wouldn't have a clue what to do with myself. OH... hehe... it just occured to me if I have adult children then it's pretty likely I will have GRANDCHILDREN. That, I know, I can definately do. All the benefits of being a mom without having to bear children. Woohoo! I hope my future daughter in laws will like me because I plan to be around a lot.

I'll leave you with pictures of Jennica and Aaron's hands. Jennica is learning to paint her fingernails on her own, and Aaron isn't quite obssesive enough with being a "manly" boy to know he shouldn't want to have his fingers painted. Jennica did his thumb. Luckily it's slow drying polish so he's wiped most of it off... probably on my couch... before it dried.



Shelley said...

Goodness! I know someone shouldn't have a career in painting nails. LOL.

Ok, I have to say I don't relate on what you're going through right now because I don't have any children, but I hope to experience what you're experiencing someday in the future. I feel like I'm not ready to be a Mom yet.

mandbrid said...

I totally understand what you are talking about Cam...I waited this weekend for those few talks that would really encourage me as a mom and wife and they were worth it. I woke up this morning with a renewed sense of purpose and strength. What a wonderful opportunity it is to be a mother of young children!

Wendy said...

Oh Cam, you will be a wonderful mom of bigger children and a FABULOUS mom of adult kids...especially if you can keep that feeling in your heart (about being an adult kid yourself). You will be friends with your adult children and will not be expected to know everything, but to be able to give perspective so they have a richer understanding of the things that happen in life before they make choices for themselves. It is AWESOME when your children turn into peers...and you can laugh at yourselves together!
I have complete faith that you will have a rich life filled with giving, learning and laughing at each stage of your children's growth. You have that kind of personality. And I also have every faith that you will fill the time that gradually frees up with many other fulfilling activities. It is just your nature :o)

Jesse Edwards said...

No kidding! some seriously great talks! I love the way I feel by Sunday afternoon. So inspired to be better. It made me really appreciate my family and everything I have! I'm with you about kids getting big. It's going to be tough!

Anonymous said...

Cami, sometimes I think we are sisters, seperated at birth. You of course being the OLD one... hehe. You mention these speakers and feeling like they were talking straight to you. Sometimes I feel that same strange feeling. You write, and it touches my heart. You are by far the best friend I could ever hope for and I love you more than words can say. I wish so much I could see you this year, I feel like I've waited so long. I think you are an awesome mum and an amazing friend and all round wonder women, how could you not be a great mum to older kids??
What a blessing to have you in my life, Thankyou! Alison.

(by the way I'm not trying to be anonymous, my computer just wont let me do it any other way, frustrating)

ahalversen (DBA) said...

Cam, I think you put perfectly into words what we are all feeling! Those talks all touched my heart in the same way. What an inspiration! I definitely needed them. Those fingernails just crack me up too! LOL!